Back then, it was just called “parenting.” Today? Half of it would get you at least one CPS visit. 70s, ’80s, or even ’90s parents did not hover over us or track our every move. They just handed us over a bike, a key, and some vague advice: “Don’t die.” And somehow we lived to tell the tale. Here are things our parents did that would probably land them on a parenting “no-no” list today.
Leaving You to Wander the Streets Until Dusk… Alone
“Get home before streetlights come on” was the only curfew our parents issued us. We did not have a phone or GPS – only vibes. We wandered neighborhoods like stray cats, staying away from suspicious strangers and dangerous playground equipment. These days? That is a missing child alert in the making.
Feeding You Whatever Was Cheap and Fast
Breakfast for them was a cigarette and a cup of black coffee. For you? Frosted sugar bombs, red food color #40, and everything microwaved. There was no such concept of nutrition for us kids. If it was affordable, hot, and could shut you up, then it was good enough.
Letting Strangers Babysit You (Sometimes Forever)
Mom’s coworker’s cousin was suddenly the new babysitter. No background screening, no qualifications, but a “vibe” and perhaps a carton of smokes. They’d even forget to feed you sometimes. Today, you’d have a news story. Then: “Don’t open the door to anyone, and don’t touch the stove.”
Leaving You in the Car While They Shopped
“Oh, you’ll be fine!” they shouted, locking us in like dogs before dashing off to the supermarket for “just five minutes” (read: 45 minutes). No water. No AC. No entertainment other than to stare at the plastic in meltdown. Today, it is child endangerment. Then, just another Tuesday afternoon at the supermarket.
Enabling You to Ride in the Back of a Truck
Seat belts: none. Seats: none. You, five of your cousins, and the wind in your hair at 60 miles per hour. Riding in the bed of a pickup truck was the ultimate childhood freedom—or reckless endangerment, depending on how you look at things. Today? Most states make it a crime. Then? That was how you rode to the family barbecue.
Spanking You in Public with Zero Shame
You can whip somebody in the middle of Walmart, and no one would even raise an eyebrow. Full store, aisle seven. Today? Viral video, child protective services hotline, online comment battle. But in the good ol’ days? Just “discipline,” administered with a sandal, wooden spoon, or whatever was handy.
Letting You Watch R-Rated Movies… at Age 8
Terminator? Sure. Silence of the Lambs? Why not. No filtering, no age restrictions—just you and trauma in the form of movie night. If your parents actually were cool, they even added popcorn. These days, that would count as emotional damage. Then, “He’s mature for his age.”
Off You Go to the Corner Shop on Your Own at Age 6
“Get me cigarettes. Don’t forget the bread.” Off you’d go with a scrunched-up £5 note and not a single soul to look over you. Today, that shopkeeper would phone the police, and your parent would go viral for all the wrong reasons.
Ignoring Mental Health Like It Didn’t Exist
Anxious? “Go out.” Depressed? “You’re lazy.” Therapy was for “crazy people” and feelings were for suckers. Our childhood plan for well-being? Suffering in silence. Now, we have diagnoses. Then, you were just “moody” or “dramatic”—and punished for it.
Letting You Swim Without Supervision
A deep lake, no lifeguard, and you barely knew how to doggy paddle? That was called fun. Your parents were far away, more than likely having a beer and assuming you’d “get by somehow.” Floaties? Ha! Nowadays, that’s grounds for a lawsuit. Back then? Just summer.
Sending You to School Sick (or Injured)
If you were not actually vomiting or bleeding to death, you were in school. Fever? Take a Tylenol and suck up. Broken toe? “You can still walk.” Nobody ever believed in sick days unless you were near death. Today’s helicopter parenting would deem that inhumane.
No Sunscreen. Ever.
To get sunburnt was a ritual of life, not an issue of health. “You’ll tan later” came as the sequel to third-degree burns. SPF? Oh, that was for “sensitive types.” We were, however, becoming little beachside rotisserie lobsters in the meantime.
Telling You to Hitchhike or Walk Miles Alone
No ride? Not to worry—your legs still work, right? Or maybe you could “ask a neighbor” or (gulp) hitchhike. They trusted the universe (and strangers!) to a degree today’s people can’t quite match. Nowadays? That’s a horror movie in the making. Back in the day? That was how you made it to soccer practice.
Using the Garden Hose as a Drinking Fountain
Why bother to go inside and get a glass of water when you have lukewarm, potentially rusty hose water with a hint of rubber flavoring? We were basically hydrating off a bacteria buffet. But it built character, right?
Never Helping With Homework
Struggling with math? “Figure it out.” Having trouble with reading? “That’s what school’s for.” Parents did not help unless yelling was involved. You learned on your own or failed. Now, parents pay tutors, use apps, and pull all-nighters. Back then, you were on your own, kid.
Making You Answer the Landline Like a Receptionist
“Hello? Who is calling? Hold on a minute, please.” We were unpaid telephony assistants with zero telephone training. Bonus points if the caller was somebody whom your mum didn’t wish to speak to — “Tell them I’m in the bath!”
Letting You Play with Questionable Toys
Lawn darts. Metal playgrounds that were literal frying pans. Chemistry sets that might actually explode. Toys in the good old days were not so much “fun” but rather “potential killing zones.” Warning labels? Who is she? If it did not burn you, cut you, or blind you, was this really a toy to begin with?
Using Fear as a Discipline Tool (and Laughing About It)
Whether the wooden spoon, the belt, or simply “the look,” fear was the disciplinary default. And if you cried too loudly? “I’ll give you something to cry about.” Go ahead, try that now and enjoy the social services visit.
Forcing You to Hug Creepy Relatives
“Give Uncle Jerry a hug!” No matter how uncomfortable or gross he made you feel, refusing was never an option. Consent? Never heard of it. You were raised to be well-mannered, even if it made your skin crawl. Today, that’s a hard no. Back then? Just “family bonding.”
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