We’ve all performed at least one “please-like-me” action at work. You know, the forced laugh, the overexplaining, or the fifth “just checking in” in one hour. We all want to appear confident, but some office habits shout insecurity louder than an all-staff typo on an email. Here are 17 office habits that can make you appear uncertain of yourself – and how to drop them before your confidence starts collecting dust.
Talking Too Fast
Speed-talking may seem effective, but it really yells nervousness. People who are confident take their time. They allow words to breathe. If you’re talking quickly when giving a presentation, it screams that you want to get it over with rather than that you believe in what you’re talking about.
Avoiding Eye Contact
You might have all the great ideas in the room, but if you can’t look someone in the eye, they’ll think you don’t believe in them. Failing to maintain eye contact, looking down or away, or talking to your screen rather than to people says, “I’d rather disappear.”
Starting Every Sentence with “Sorry”
You’re not sorry to ask a question. Or to email someone. Or to just exist in a meeting. Apologizing all the time makes you seem like you’re waiting for permission to exist. Ditch the “sorry” and replace it with some confidence – say “thanks for your patience” or just… speak clearly. Apologies are reserved for real mistakes, not for just existing at work.
Over-Explaining Every Decision
Nobody needs a 10-minute TED Talk on why you chose that font. If you take at least ten minutes every time to explain every little decision, people stop listening to your logic – and begin picking up on your uncertainty. Confident people don’t explain, they enlighten. You don’t need a thesis stating why you chose Calibri over Arial. Just tell what you chose, why it works, and move on.
Constantly Seeking Validation
“Was that okay?” “Do you think this works?” – do those ring a bell? Needing reassurance every five minutes does not make you a team player; it makes you appear uncertain. It is okay to get feedback, but asking for approval after literally each move is not something confident people do.
Saying “Does That Make Sense?” Too Often
It’s very innocent-sounding, but it quietly erodes your credibility. You’re injecting doubt ahead of everyone else. Switch it to, “Let me know if you’d like more detail.” That asserts, “I’m confident – but open.”
Laughing After Everything You Say
That little nervous laugh after every statement? It kills authority. It tells people you’re scared of being taken too seriously – or worse, being wrong. Silence after your words can be way more powerful than nervous giggles.
Always Volunteering for Extra Work
Being a yes-person is wonderful. Being an office doormat? Not really. Agreeing to do everything just to look “valuable” makes you come across as desperate for validation. Boundaries are confidence put into practice. Learn when to offer help – and when to stand back and let others manage their own messes.
Downplaying Your Achievements
“I just got lucky” or “It wasn’t a big deal” would be so… not okay, even if sounding humble, because it tells others you don’t see your own worth. Now, confidence doesn’t mean to go and start boasting about everything. In fact, it’s about owning your wins without flinching. You earned that success, so don’t pretend it was an accident.
Editing Yourself Mid-Sentence
Saying “Actually, what I meant was…” every few seconds? You’re showing that you don’t have faith in your own ideas. Say it once, loudly, and let it stick. Everyone makes mistakes – confidence doesn’t fall apart over them.
Overusing Emojis and Exclamation Marks
“Thanks!!!” does not make you friendly – it makes you appear uncertain if your message needs support. A little warmth is fine, but if every email reads like a group chat, it’s time to tone it down. One exclamation point is enthusiasm. Three is anxiety in punctuation form.
Letting Others Take Credit (and Staying Silent)
If you did the job but allowed someone else to take the credit, that’s not humility – it’s self-sabotage. Asserting yourself isn’t arrogance – it’s self-respect. Credit is money in the workplace, and giving yours away makes you appear weak.
Talking Too Much in Meetings
Ironically, talking too much makes you appear insecure. When you try to fill every silence with noise, it appears that you’re defending your value. People who are confident know when to talk – and when to shut up.
Laughing at Jokes That Aren’t Funny
You don’t need to fake a laugh at your boss’s half-funny “dad joke.” Forced laughter comes across as people-pleasing, not professionalism. If it’s not hilarious, a courteous smile suffices. True confidence is about not needing to perform to be liked – you can just be.
Avoiding Credit or Praise
When a person praises your work and you respond, “Oh, it was nothing,” you just erased your effort. Take the compliment. Own it. Underplaying your achievements makes you forgettable – and replaceable.
Being Too Agreeable
“Yes” to every request. “Sure” to every ridiculous deadline. That’s not a team player – that’s a people-pleaser. Confidence isn’t about being liked; it’s about being respected. Practice saying no without guilt.
Waiting to Be Seen Rather Than Speaking Out
No one’s handing out gold stars for silent excellence anymore. If you need recognition, you’re going to have to speak up for yourself. Covering behind your work doesn’t make you enigmatic; it makes you irrelevant. Confidence is saying, “Here’s what I’ve done” – and actually owning it.
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