We all have our insecurities… but some people practically wear theirs like a reality show on the Street. Some people can’t help but participate in attention-seeking behaviors and performative confidence, yet these tiny “I’m totally fine” moves often scream the total opposite. Once you start to spot them, you can’t unsee them. So let’s be a bit savage (yet honest) and explore the 7 things people do in public that shout, “Validate me, I’m crumbling on the inside.”
Making Everything a Competition
They can’t just tell a story; they need to tell a better one. You got a promotion? They got two. You ran 5 miles? They “ran a marathon without even training.” It’s not about being the best; it’s about needing to appear better. Competing with friends in casual conversation isn’t confidence; it’s a sure sign that they are feeling inadequate. If you have confidence, you celebrate instead of competing.
Talking Extra Loud So Everyone Hears Them
You know that person who all of a sudden begins talking like they were talking to a crowd at Wembley? Yeah – that’s not confidence, that’s just a plea for validation. They want to express they are funny, interesting, or impressive – but it’s just all signals’ look at me, please!’ The louder the laugh, the deeper the need for validation.
Oversharing Life Drama in Public Like it’s a Podcast
Some folks believe that they need to update a stranger who is sitting in solitude at a café about their breakup, or their awkward family dinner every Thanksgiving, or what it’s like to work for their toxic boss. No, you don’t have to. Sharing too much information with whoever happens to be around you in public has more to do with attention-seeking than connection. It’s the same conversation as saying, “If I can’t control how I feel, at least I have control of who gets to see how I feel.”
Their Outfits Are for Attention, Not Expression
Of course, we all know that personal style is a personal decision… until it becomes a performance. There is a fundamental difference between dressing confidently and dressing like your worth as a human being solely depends on whether or not the person you are sitting next to notices you. When everything you wear is loud and obnoxious, and every part of your outfit screams “notice me, notice me,” you can no longer consider it fashion; it is an expression of fear. Fear of being ordinary, of being typical.
Documenting Everything for Social Media Approval
We get it – you went out. But if you can’t eat or dance or breathe without posting it for all of your followers, that’s not confidence. You literally have insecurity in HD. Those who focus on their phone instead of the moment aren’t living; they’re merely performing. The more curated a life looks, the messier it usually is in real life. Real joy doesn’t take 47 takes and a ring light.
Stealing Attention from Others at Every Turn
Have you ever been in a situation or conversation with someone who can’t bear someone else being the center of focus for even 10 seconds? Every story gets turned back to them… bigger, sadder, funnier. This is actually not storytelling – this is insecurity in action. These people can’t kick back and be the supporting character for a moment. If you are secure, you just vibe; you don’t need to take over conversations.
Saying Sorry for Everything
The word “sorry” has been so mashed up for some, it has become annoying background noise in their lives – “sorry” for speaking, “sorry” for being in someone’s space, “sorry” for literally passing through the doorway. They think it’s humility, but it certainly is not; it is a survival method. They think they are making themselves smaller, less bothersome, and more lovable by shrinking. They are really just erasing themselves.
17 Things You Might Be Doing Out of Childhood Trauma
That people-pleasing, panic cleaning, or ghosting behavior? That could be your inner 8-year-old trying to feel safe all these years. If you’ve ever wondered why you freak out over texts or can’t keep still in silence, these behaviors might be eye-opening for you.
17 Things You Might Be Doing Out of Childhood Trauma