Back then, “rich” did not equal yachts and private flights—it equaled strangely particular flexes that only fellow kids would understand. It was about who had the coolest lunchbox, the largest TV set, or the tastiest cereal. If you caught any of these at someone’s house as a kid, you knew they were rolling (or felt like they were). Let’s go take a trip down that savage memory lane.
Owning More Than One Gaming Console
Nintendo and PlayStation? Choose a battle. Children who owned multiple gaming consoles were invincible. They weren’t just gamers — they were legends. All the neighborhood kids wished they could spend a sleepover at their house, and they knew it.
A Brand-New Backpack Each Year
Same beat-up backpack for six years? Relevant. Children who rolled up each September with a new Jansport or Nike book bag? That was a declaration. New year, new you — and seemingly new finances.
Having a Trampoline in Your Backyard
If you had a trampoline outside your house, congratulations: you were the social hub of the neighborhood. All the other kids had to beg their Mom and Dad to come over and risk a sprained ankle for a five-minute thrill.
Ownership of a Computer (Bonus Points for Dial-Up Internet)
If you had a big ol’ desktop computer at home — AND you got to use it without having mom over your shoulder — you were living the dream. Dial-up may have sounded like two warring robots clashing away, but at least you could flex your Neopets account.
Designers’ Sneakers Before They Were Popular
Those cool kids rocking Jordans or fresh Vans before they went mainstream? Yeah, they were something different. The rest of us were just hoping our Payless knockoffs made it through dodgeball season.
Having a Fridge with an Ice Dispenser
If your fridge spat forth crushed ice, you were pretty much royalty. Children who had ice dispensers did not just have a snack — they had a luxury. The rest of us were breaking apart ice trays by means of frozen fingers while hoping technology would rescue us someday.
Ordering Pizza… Just Because
A spur-of-the-moment Tuesday-night pizza delivery? That was a status symbol, not dinner. The rest of us just gazed upon another suspiciously shiny meatloaf, wondering where things went wrong.
Riding a Brand New Bike (Not a Rusty Hand-Me-Down)
That gleaming new BMX bike was screaming out the loudest, “I’m better than you.” If you weren’t showing up with hand-me-down dents and a mysterious squeak, then you might as well have ridden a limo to school. Add a point if the tires at least matched.
Branded Lunchables Every Day
Eating a Lunchable was like arriving at lunch in a Gucci bag. Bonus flex if it was the pizza one. The rest of us were exchanging soggy sandwiches and coveting that cool, processed luxury.
Going to Disney World (More Than Once)
If you went to Disney and returned with the actual Mickey Mouse ears, you might as well have returned from Paris. You were rich-rich. The rest of us could only dream about it while doing chores.
A Bedroom With a TV (WITH Cable)
Having your own TV? Iconic. Having it connected to the cable? God-tier. If you could binge-watch cartoons from bed while snacking on Cheetos, you did not just win at being a kid—you outright owned being a kid.
Taking Family Vacations Somewhere That Required a Plane
Beach day just an hour away? Adorable. Flying somewhere? Mogul status. If you showed up at school rocking a tan and a “Hard Rock Cafe” shirt from a different country, you were oozing money everywhere.
Disney VHS Collection Worthy of Its Own Shelf
If you had rows of fat Disney VHS tapes stacked like trophies, then you were both cash and cultured. Children who owned the entire “Vault” collection weren’t merely spoils — they were on the cusp of being curators of great cinematic art.
Your Family Had a Pool (Above-Ground Counts)
Pool time was the epitome of cool. It did not matter if you had a blow-up wonder or a full-scale cement paradise — if you had a pool, you owned summer break. All of a sudden, you were everybody’s “best friend.”
Earning an Allowance You Didn’t Earn
If you got actual money just for existing and not for cleaning the entire house or cutting three lawns? Yeah, you were a Richie Rich. Some of us were working for $2 a week.
Having a Bedroom Phone Line
A dedicated phone line?? You weren’t just rich, you were powerful. No duking it out over the phone with siblings, no overheard parents — just unadulterated, unedited gossiping with your BEST FRIENDS FOREVER for hours on end.
Grocery Shopping at Fancy Stores
Skip the generic cereal. If the pantry was filled with name-brand and organic products from Whole Foods (or heaven forbid, Trader Joe’s?), the family was swimming like Scrooge McDuck in a sea of gold coins.
Sporting Braces AND Coloured Bands
Braces were EXPENSIVE. If you wore them—and particularly if you dyed the ones you wore to match the holiday—you were showing off more wealth each time you smiled than a rapper shows off jewelry.
Riding in a Minivan With Automatic Doors
Ignore Ferraris. If your mother drove up in a minivan where the doors somehow opened by themselves? That was rich kid power. All the kids on the pickup line gawked as if you just stepped out of a limo.
Birthday Parties That Were Practically Weddings
Clown acts, rented horses, bounce houses, catered meals — kids’ birthdays were full-blown affairs. If the goody bag at your party consisted of more than you got from one week’s worth of allowance, you were a mini-star.
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