Here are 12 signs that suggest you might be a people pleaser and some tips on avoiding falling into this pattern of behavior.
12. You say yes to things you don’t want to do just to make others happy.
You have a hard time saying “no” to others, even when you really want to. It’s time that you recognize and acknowledge your own needs and importance. It’s not selfish, and your priorities should always come first.
11. You avoid conflict at all costs
You avoid expressing your genuine opinions or feelings to avoid conflict, even if it means sacrificing your needs.
10. You prioritize other people’s needs over your own
You often prioritize other people’s needs and desires; hence you put the requirements and wants of others above your own.
9. You struggle to set boundaries with others
You have difficulty setting boundaries with others and may feel uncomfortable when others do the same with you.
8. You often apologize for things that aren’t your fault.
You often apologize, even when you haven’t done anything wrong. This can stem from a fear of disapproval or a desire to keep others happy but can lead to guilt and inadequacy.
7. You constantly seek validation and approval from others
People pleasers may seek validation and approval from others and may feel upset when they don’t receive it. It can lead to a lack of self-esteem and reliance on external validation.
6. You have a difficult time making decisions on your own
You struggle to make decisions independently and may seek input from others before making a choice.
5. You take criticism or rejection very personally
You often take criticism or rejection very personally. It can be because you base your sense of self-worth on how others perceive you, and negative feedback can feel like a personal attack.
4. You seek perfectionism
People pleasers may feel they need to be perfect to be liked and accepted by others. This can lead to unrealistic expectations of yourself and a fear of failure.
3. You feel responsible for other people’s emotions
People pleasers often feel responsible for other people’s emotions. They may go out of their way to make others happy or avoid conflict to prevent upsetting them. People pleasers may also feel guilty if others are upset, even if they had nothing to do with the situation.
2. You feel guilty when you do something for yourself instead of for others
You believe that self-care is selfish or feel like you should always prioritize the needs and wants of others over your own.
1. You feel exhausted and burnt out from constantly trying to please others
People pleasers may feel drained and exhausted from constantly trying to please others. This can lead to burnout and a lack of energy for their pursuits.
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It’s essential to be aware of these signs and take action to address them, either by speaking to a supervisor or HR representative, seeking support from colleagues or a therapist, or considering finding a new job if the situation is beyond repair.
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